From ‘Pritchop’s Fables’
‘Vishvamitra And Menka: A Love Story Of Our Times’
61 x 91.5 cms
acrylic on canvas
After Fifty Seven Years of Heroic Sadhana It Was Over In A Flash. Poor Vishvamitra, The Fierce Ascetic, Had No Leg Left To Stand On. Recently His Siddhis (Spiritual Powers) Had Been Growing And The Jealous And Angry Gods Thought His Head Had Gotten Too Big For His Boot (He Only Had One). So The By Now Very Disturbed, Raging And Extremely Pissed Off Gods Sent The Irresistibly Tall And Sensual Brunette Menka, Who They Had Picked Up At A Gentlemen’s Club On Mount Athos After A Stag Party, To The Olive Grove Where Vishvamitra Had Been Standing All These Years Since Puberty, To Distract Him, And This Was Soon To Be His Downfall.
Menka Disguised Her Best Friend The Vestal Virgin Lap Dancer DakiniKaliYoginiSiddhaHila
As He Leaned Forward And Stretched Out His Tongue To Take A Lick, In This His Greatest Moment Of Vulnerability And Weakness, Menka And DakiniKaliYoginiSiddhaHila
Under (Very) Different Circumstances The Paroxysms Of Orgasmic Spasms Coursing Through His Totally Unprepared Nervous System Could Have Been A Source Of Joy And Delight, But In This Context And At Such A Late Hour, Well Past His Bed-Time (He Still Called It Bed-Time Even Though He Slept Standing Up So Technically There Was No Bed), The Unfolding Of The Day’s Events Was Making Him Feel Uneasy. He Wasn’t Sure Where This Was All Going.
The Next Morning When His Mother Peeled His Squashed And Dried Up Body Off The Refrigerator Door, Which Woke Him From His Concussion, He Was Utterly Horrified. Not Only Had The Women, Like Shakti Vampires, Brutally Extracted The Life Force From His Bruised And Battered Physical Body, And Broken The Circuit Of Subtle Energy That Usually Cartwheeled Through His Auric Body, Leaving Him Utterly Depleted Of Human And Cosmic Energy, But Also It Appeared, To His Extreme Consternation, That His Wallet Had Been Stolen.
The Wallet Had Great Sentimental Value. Made From The Hair Of Three Goat’s, and Painstakingly Hand-Sown Together Using Twine From A Toad’s Bladder, His Then, Only Ever Girlfriend, The Utterly Besotted And Devoted Tracey, Had Given It To Him At His Fourteenth Birthday Party, The Day Before He Decided To Start His Penance On One Leg, The Same Day He, Some Say Ruthlessly, Dumped Her. Besides It Had All His Cash In It.
Unconsolable He Searched Everywhere On The Kitchen Floor Looking For His Wallet, On All Fours, Like a Dog Or Some Other Medium-Sized Mammal. He Could Not Find It, Not Even Under The Broken Baseboard At The Foot Of The Kitchen Sink Where He Had Often Lost Stuff As A Small Boy.
Slowly It Dawned On Him. He Was Now No Longer On One, Or Any, Leg. Poor Vishvamitra; His Religious Career Was Finished In A Flash. He Sobbed Deeply While His Poor Heart-Broken Mother Tried To Cheer Him Up By Telling Him The Family Jokes And Riddles That Had Been Passed Down From Generation To Generation. But It Was Useless In Changing His Mood. He Had Heard Them Many Times Before, And Since The Jokes And Riddles Originated In Stone Age Times There Was No Context To Make Any Sense Of Them In The Modern Age.
However At This Point When Everything Seemed Irretrievably Lost, And It Was, Like A Bolt Of Lightning From On High, A Dharmic Slice Of Wisdom From Adi Da Samraj, A Spiritual Master That He Had Read A Few Lines Of And Once Toyed With The Idea Of Following, Popped Into His Mind, As Though He Was Channeling Some Higher Intelligence:
‘Your Objections To Anything Don’t Mean Shit!
Was It Menka, DakiniKaliYoginiSiddhaHila
Find Out In Next Week’s Episode Of ‘Vishvamitra And Menka: A Love Story Of Our Times’