Maria Hoop, 1986, Netherlands
On Sunday July 20th Avatar Adi Da Samraj left the Doelen Crest Hotel for the former monastery at Maria Hoop, now The European Danda. The previous day He had been quietly relaxing in his hotel.
I was seated with some others in the garden at the back of the monastery, the lawn in front of the door in the photograph, adjacent to what is now called The Divine Domain. Other devotees were serving in various capacities in the main building preparing for Adi Da’s imminent arrival.
We were sitting in silent contemplation uncertain as to the exact time His bus would arrive. There was a point when I knew He had just arrived.
I felt a sweet Presence slowly Penetrating my heart, a soft, nurturing, calming Presence, like a cooling wind on a hot day. That felt to me the moment, (though I have no scientific proof!), that Adi Da Samraj – then called Heart Master Da Love-Ananda – Spiritually as well as physically entered the building and the grounds
Later we were seated in Da Kapel. We were waiting a long time for Him to come. Later my friend Lenie Koole told me why we had been waiting so long. She was seated in Da Kapel when someone tapped her on the shoulder to leave the room. It transpired that as Adi Da was walking towards Da Kapel to meet with us, He passed the kitchen, which in the rush for all of us to be seated had been left untidy. Beloved Said He would not come to meet with us until the kitchen was orderly and conscious. Lenie, being in charge of the kitchen had to tidy it! As He Says our shoes must be left in order before we step into the Holy Place with Him. This So that we can stay with Him Only and need never go back for something so mundane as washing a spoon or fork or putting some plates in the dishwasher!
When Adi Da did Speak with us He romanced us – we, the men as well as the women, became ‘girlfriend’ to our New Super Handsome Funny Endearing Sensitive Passionate Divine Boyfriend! The Perfect Boyfriend! His Dutch, German and British gopis (lovers) were crazy in Love with Him! Most of us had never seen Him before or heard Him Speak in the flesh. We sat entranced, riveted to Him, spellbound, obsessed with Him, distracted beyond ourselves, admiring the way He Sat, The Way He gestured, The Way He Moves, wanting to be like Him, to Feel His Presence, His State.
We were helpless in love, the willing targets of a Divine Seduction, in which, like Krishna with His gopis He made Himself irresistible, and left us longing for more contact with Him. He Spoke for four and a half hours, very intimate, very sweet, like He was our best ever friend, which of course He Is! He was so funny, and made us laugh like only one’s lover can make one laugh, that combination of humour and deep intimacy and attraction and trust that sends thrills of delight trickling and tremoring in the body, in the heart, while the mind takes a well earned vacation.
For example He Spoke about Soul’s Hole, which He had visited, having been informed it was one of the principal places of spiritual power and significance in Holland. ‘We have been taken to some very amusing places, (laughter) the other day we drove four or five hours to go to what? What was it called? Some hole or other!……(laughter) Soul’s Hole? We drove around in the woods for the longest time trying to find Soul’s Hole!……….It was a pleasant forest. A very pleasant place. (laughter)
There are some benches for picknicking, and a hundred or so yards into the woods there is a little impression in the ground .. (laughter)…….in the middle….. there is a stake with a little sign on it in Dutch that roughly translates – don’t step in here it’s muddy!(laughter)………on the other side of the bog is a strange mask, recently made for use in some curious ritual……..it was a mask of Mickey Mouse.’ (laughter)
Another place He visited because it was supposed to be spiritually significant was St John’s Cathedral in Thorn. ‘Have you ever been to the Cathedral in Thorn? Well if you have not been there yet, don’t bother.’ (laughter). Adi Da came to the conclusion that ‘there simply are no significant places of Spiritual power in the Netherlands’, and He said that He was thinking that maybe the reason for this is that the Dutch feel vulnerable to the possibility of being flooded so ‘they do not lay up their treasures on Earth.’
He joked about a relic in the Cathedral; Saint Benedict’s ‘dried-up forearm….displayed in a rather inglorious little glass tube…(laughter) …..upstairs is a beautiful reliquary that used to house the wretched forearm (laughter) but now the reliquary is more interesting to people than the forearm The stewards of the church put the forearm in a cheap glass box and the reliquary upstairs in the museum for everyone to pay change to look at. Nobody really cares about the forearm of St Benedict. I do not know where the rest of St Benedict is, but I wonder if any part of Him is treated with honor these days.’
He joked that one of the devotees had told Him it was only two hours from Amsterdam to Maria Hoop. ‘Yes’ He said ‘by rocketship!’. And joked how when Frans took him to the border of the monastery grounds, and pointed across the fields to Germany. He had asked, ‘and which way will they be coming when the Germans attack’? Many times Beloved unearths hidden traumas and anxieties, exposes them so they can be purified and released.
When He spoke about feeling the Shakti Energy at Westminster Abbey at Queen Elizabeth’s tomb, which had given Him shakti fever, He was joking whether the Shakti Force was coming from association with Queen Elizabeth or from her sister Queen Mary whose tomb was close by, whether maybe it wasn’t a Protestant influence after all but a purely Catholic one. He Said ‘Maybe it wasn’t anything to do with them personally.’ Then He Teased us with The Mystery, The Enigma of Who He Is, by suggesting that The Shakti Energy may have come from someone who visited Westminster Abbey in the past – ‘perhaps it was Me’! We laughed and He laughed with us.
(Comments by Adi Da Samraj are copyrighted 2016 ASA)
He was, and still is even though He has now left the body, such Fun! Re-remembering all this, His sweet, loving Play with us, and reliving it as I write, I can feel the same happy feeling, the same longing I felt them. It is giving me goosebumps just think about it!
As well as being so humorous, so funny, so that we found ourselves laughing so much, He spoke about many profound matters like ‘whether we have free will’ and ‘what is the mechanism of doubt.’ He talked with amazing knowledge and insight about Stonehenge, Glastonbury and the old pagan culture of The British Isles and it’s relationship with Christianity. I and my British friends were amazed. He gave us our best ever British History Lesson! We were learning so many new and interesting things. He was, and still is, Fascinating!
Like my friends I was absolutely riveted, spellbound by Adi Da. Distracted beyond myself. I remember thinking that if there really had been a Jesus Christ the feelings his disciples would have had, the love, devotion, amazement, attraction, excitement and passion would be similar to what my friends and I were experiencing now. I could not, we could not believe how lucky we were. Where else would we want to be on the planet at that time than in Da Kapel with Him. Our hearts were overflowing with gratitude, and heartbroken by His Sacrifice. It had many years that He had taken questions from devotees from the floor, as He did now, and answered them, and with such Genius and Grace.
The devotes who were travelling with Him since the early days said it reminded them of the question and answer sessions at the LA Melrose ashram in the early 70s. Each devotee who had a question would stand up to ask their question their heart ‘overflowing with abundant joy’, heartbroken, coming to Him with real need, and He would meet each devotees’s need, speak to their true heart need
The next day Monday July 21 Adi Da meditated with devotees in the more advanced levels of practice. However there were constant interruptions. First the noise of a tractor, then someone shouting, then a loudspeaker announcing an upcoming fair and finally the whirring of jet fighters overhead. Beloved Adi Da finally laughed and threw up His hands. He left laughing all the way to his room.
Later in the day Adi Da Sat with all devotees in Darshan in Da Kapel. He was dressed in blue. No longer orange. He felt the Sign of Orange had outlived its usefulness to us. How thoughtful! How caring He is! Everything He did and does is for the sake of His devotees. Everything! Even the choice of the colour of His clothes! He was phenomenally Powerful. His wide-eyed Gaze in the Heart, drew us all in to His Heart, Drifted us down Deep into Him so that we were immersed in His True Water of Love-Blissful Conscious Light. Yesterday had felt like all Beauty Foot, all Mother Force, Nurturing.
This Darshan had that quality still, but also now there was Father Force. Power Foot Force, like He was Burning Himself into our bodies, hearts and minds, Tunnelling through our contraction to open us Up and Widen our hearts! That is what if felt like to me, but I am just one person, one observer seeing Him from just one point in the Room. So What Did Da Love-Ananda look Really look like? And what did that Darshan Really feel like? There are lots of devotees in Europe who were there, and are still breathing Him in, every day. Grab hold of them, sit your friend, your Gurubhai, your heart-sister, heart-brother down, give them a cup of tea and ask them to speak! I guarantee there will be some laughter together, some tears, some fun, some awe and two broken hearts by the end.
When I walked out of Da Kapel onto the lawn I could still feel His Presence in my heart and in the atmosphere, filling the Space, and I remember I felt so Happy, so Ecstatic with the Revelation that He Is Everywhere and not limited to His bodily human Form.
The next day Adi Da left for Amsterdam. The Dutch devotees went ahead of Adi Da to prepare for His Arrival there. The British and German devotees went home. Everyone leaving had drunk deep from the Well of Happiness of seeing the MahaSiddha, the MahaPurusha, The Expected One, Heart Master Da Love-Ananda, Liberator, our Spiritual Friend. This Great Lover of beings had rekindled the impulse to Realization in His European devotees. He had Gathered us in, deep into His Heart Embrace. He had made us laugh, made us cry, shown us His Beauty Foot and His Power Foot, made us fall in love with Him all over again and deeper than before. What a Wonder! What a Miracle! Feeling fed by His Darshan, renewed, refreshed and enlivened, with the wound of increased vihara (longing) aching in their hearts, His devotees left feeling Happy and Satisfied.
I could not tear myself away and for now I and another British devotee had permission to stay on longer. One Dutch devotee did not leave for Amsterdam. He was put in charge of looking after the building and managing the Guru-Seva (service) of the two of us who stayed on.
That night I sneaked along the corridors into the bedroom the Master had just vacated. Moonlight was streaming through the window, collecting in a pool of light on the floor.
I sat by His bed cross-legged, and meditated through the night. The atmosphere was thick with His Presence. I sat immersed in His Bliss, suffused with His Bliss in my heart. His human body had left, but He was still there. His Presence had not left. I could feel Him Pressing down into my head, Pressing against my heart. I felt a bit guilty, like a thief in the night, stealing the luxurious threads of Spiritual Transmission and Light that seemed to be hovering in the air above His Bed, and all around. Or a Shakti Vampire, coming in the dead of night to the Source of all Life, to drink deep from the Well of Life and taste the most potent Elixir there is, The Transmission Pouring from The Master’s Heart, to be reborn afresh, refortified, invigorated, made anew to meet the new day’s dawn. I drank deep until I could drink no more, and intoxicated and tired with sleep, fell over like a fool on the Master’s floor, curled up next to His Bed like a purring cat.
The next day the Dutch manager kept looking for me to help serve the facility, going from room to room to find me. I was exhausted after being awake all night and was playing hide and seek with him, insensitively and selfishly ignoring his frustrated calls and sleeping in rooms where I thought he had least chance of finding me, then if he did find me, disappearing again into another room in this large facility, and crashing out on one of the mattresses I was supposed to be stacking and putting into storage. As I write this now I am aware of Bhakti (devotion) yes but I feel the edge of my egoity, which, like creeps from a well, slithers up the sides of the well into the Light to be Purified by His Grace. My friend whose calls I ignored is now dead and it is to late to apologize face to face, but I want to take the opportunity to praise a wonderful devotee who loved and served the Master so much, and I am sure he still is and does, the sweet, devoted and funny Han van Rosendaal.
I could hide from Han. But I could not hide from the Master. He had Empowered this monastery with His Spiritual Presence. This Place, containing His living quarters, His Divine Domain, where God in human Form had just walked and moved and lived and breathed was now Holy, and would never be the same again.
The Spiritual Fragrance of His Person, His Sweet, Perfumed Presence was Permeating and Saturating The Space, to be felt by any devotee then, now and in the future thirsty enough, brave enough, wounded enough, devoted enough to unlock The Most Precious All-Accomplishing Siddhis and Blessings that our Master keeps in His Divine Heart, that He was and Is (then, now and always for all future time) waiting, wanting, longing to bestow and pour forth and unleash on His true devotees, to sublime them and transport them into His Divine Domain where it is Only Divinely Sweet and All Love Bliss and no mind at all.